Corrie Ten Boom tells the story of asking her father what a certain word meant. It was an immoral word, but as a little girl, she did not know that. Instead of answering her question, he asked her to pick up his suitcase. She was a little surprised at the seemingly impossible task for her small frame and said, “I can’t…it’s too heavy!” He replied, “That word you asked about is too heavy for you right now. Let Papa carry it for now, and when you are older, I promise to let you carry it.”
We try to hold heavy things we should not carry as well. We will carry injustices, unforgiveness, bitterness, envy, and worry. Thoughts of the future is a good example. “I wish I knew the future!” Ever hear anything like that…or thought something like that? Yet, the future would often be too heavy for us to hold along with all of “today” that we already have in our hands. God is so good to hold what we ought not carry, but we often try to hold it any way. We could easily live our lives with “what if” or “if only” questions overflowing our minds.
What if I get sick…what if I get fired…what if I cannot pay my bills…what if we get in an accident…what if my spouse dies? If only I had left earlier…if only they didn’t see that…if only I wasn’t sick…if only I married someone else…if only I hadn’t been so selfish.
The rehearsing of the unknown future or unchangeable past is endless and truly has little benefit. We certainly must learn from the past, but we cannot change the past. Sometimes we become so fixated on what we do not have that we completely miss what we do have! There is a reason why God does not give us knowledge of tomorrow; however, we may not always know what the reason is. What we do know is what He has allowed today – and that gives us plenty to be good stewards of in the meantime. He gives what we need to face right now, and by His grace, we are able to walk through it.
We must follow God as He leads, when He leads, and where He leads. God allows 3 different plans for Saul’s immediate future as a new believer.
Assassination Plans (9:23-25)
Time has passed. Most likely, this is where Saul’s trip to Arabia is understood in his ministry timeline (Gal. 1:16-18). This trip was probably to spread the gospel, but primarily meant for further study, further prayer, and focused discipleship for Saul as a new believer.
Galatians 1:18 tells us he didn’t go to Jerusalem until 3 years after his salvation. Acts 9:25-26 indicates he went to Jerusalem after his escape from his second visit to Damascus. So, the time between Acts 9:22 and Acts 9:23 is believed to be 3 years and mostly spent in Arabia.
Saul’s return to Damascus led to an assassination attempt. The Jews could not answer his arguments or dampen his zeal, so they decide to silence him once and for all (Acts 23:12; Acts 25:3).
The PERSECUTOR became the persecuted!
When the Jews AND the Governor’s guards did not see them, they let Saul down the city wall in a basket. This isn’t a new idea! Rahab let the spies down the wall in a basket in Joshua 2:15. Michal did the same for David in I Samuel 19:12. In fact, Paul refers to this event in II Cor. 11:32-33 as part of testimony of God’s providence.
Darlene Diebler Rose was a missionary in Papua New Guinea when World War II began. In short order, she and her new husband would become prisoners of war, separated in prison camps, and never see each other again. Her husband would die while in captivity. Darlene went through horrific things while a prisoner of war. She was accused of being a spy and interrogated relentlessly. The stress of her time in the camp turned her hair white while in her twenties. At one point, the camp was being bombed. All the prisoners ran to foxholes. Once she got to her assigned foxhole, she remembered the copy of the Bible she had borrowed from another prisoner was left in the barracks. She states in her autobiography (Evidence Not Seen) that the Lord would not let her leave the scriptures behind. The scriptures were such a treasure to her, but her desire to continue following God where and when He led her was nurtured fervently. She ran back to retrieve the scriptures and then ended up in a different foxhole. When the bombing was over, she came to realize that the first foxhole she had taken shelter was bombed. If she had ignored God’s still small voice, she would have died. Obeying the still small voice of the Lord to retrieve the scriptures – when it seemed safer to remain in the foxhole – actually saved her life.
There is no safer place to be than in the center of God’s will. God still had much for Saul to do before his death. There is a time to seek safety and there is a time to face danger head on…in both, God will lead us and give us grace. How sensitive are we to following the still small voice of the Lord at work, at home, in our marriage, and in our daily living?
Association Plans (9:26-29)
Barnabas brings Saul to Peter and James. Saul stays with them for 15 days. (Gal. 1:18-19) Years have now passed, and Saul has remained unwavering in his profession of faith. This extended period of time is key to the viability of Saul’s future relationships within the church.
Years ago, a young lady was required to go to a strong Christian college. She had struggled with rebellion throughout high school. It was her parents hope that she would be exposed to good preaching and teaching – and also make godly friendships along the way. There is no guarantee that a good Christian college would accomplish their desired end. There is a good crowd and a bad crowd at just about any workplace, college, church, and neighborhood. However, she did make some godly friendships and graduated years later a changed woman. The people she chose to hang around at college were different – not because she changed her geographical location, but because she had a changed heart. Once right with God, she sought friendships that wanted deeper relationship with Jesus as well. The key to her problems was the wickedness of her own heart. We often want to change the negative symptoms others see in our lives, but God wants to change our hearts!
Look at how Saul’s perspective has changed, and the only difference is a relationship with Jesus! The ones who were despised, rejected, and sought after for arrest were now most excellent in Saul’s eyes.
It DOES MATTER what we choose to believe and embrace as truth. Our associations reveal our heart’s meditations. Remember, your thoughts impact your desires, your desires impact your choices, your choices impact your habits, and your habits form your character.
Yes, Saul is a professing believer, but these disciples needed more references! Saul had established quite a reputation. The disciples struggled trusting him again. Saul had broken all trust the church had in him. He needed to rebuild trust. How do we rebuild trust? In Acts 9:27-29, we see 4 ways Saul rebuilds trust.
1. Godly Friendship.
Barnabas helps Saul in his early days as a believer. Saul puts himself under the godly counsel of Barnabas and has a teachable spirit. Are we willing to be that godly friend for a wayward believer?
2. Connects with Key People
Three years passes and then Saul is brought to key people. Much spiritual growth has taken place in the past three years. Rebuilding trust is not to be rushed. Humility, patience, and teachableness are needed in great supply to rebuild trust with those we have hurt. When such spiritual maturity becomes consistent, it is then time to connect with key people (an estranged spouse, a boss, a church, etc…).
3. Establish a New Track Record
Establishing a new track record takes time! One of the biggest mistakes people make in rebuilding trust is either assuming they never can rebuild trust or expressing frustration at how long it takes. When we complain about the process, we end up minimizing the hurt we caused those with whom we are needing to rebuild trust. Barnabas rehearses the past three years of Saul’s right choices (as an eyewitness) in the presence of key leaders in the church. We must realize that the bigger the break of trust, the longer the rebuilding of trust will take.
4. Establish New Consistency
Three years have now past, and Barnabas is able to speak of how Saul has boldly preached the gospel consistently (9:29). Consistency is challenging for us all! Think about the stewardship of our own body. How consistent are we with a healthy diet and exercise? Think about our thought lives. How consistent are we with shunning envy, jealousy, bitterness, anger, and impurity from our meditations? So, recognize that the one rebuilding trust will need much prayer, forgiveness, and genuine love from the church. Never lose sight that restoration is always to goal (Gal. 6:1).
Some final thoughts on rebuilding trust. It takes two to rebuild trust. The one who broke the trust must work with a humble, teachable spirit day after day. However, the one who was hurt must also press forward with humility (James 4:10; I Peter 5:7), mercy (Luke 6:36), and genuine love (John 13:34-35; Matt. 5:44). We will often struggle with even allowing someone to rebuild trust. Allow God to be the judge and jury of their actions. He will be just.
Advance Plans (9:30)
Saul is sent to Cesarea. According to Acts 8:40, Phillip is in Cesarea (and is still there 20 years later in Acts 21:8). Tarsus is Saul’s birthplace. So, he would have citizenship in Tarsus. This would be familiar to Saul, as well as safe, AND only 10 miles inland. This would be important for transportation needs. Tarsus was also 30 miles from the mountains. Tarsus would be a strong commerce area, a university city, and a central location for crossroads of travel to give the gospel to many.
There are times when life’s circumstances are very hard, and it takes everything you have to walk through them. When I had kidney stones or when I had the initial diagnosis of two radial disc tears in my lower back with a bulging and a herniated disc – I wasn’t interested in what was happening tomorrow, or even what was for dinner, I just had my focus on working through the next hour of pain.
There is nothing like that kind of struggle that can truly draw us closer to the Lord…to depend on the Lord even more…and prepare us for what He has for us in the future. Preparation for things we don’t even know about yet.
Saul did not know his future either. Ananias may have told him that God spoke of great things Saul would suffer for the gospel. Looking back, we know Saul would preach in cities where everyone present got saved. Saul would declare the saving grace of God to Kings, Queens, and even Caesar himself. So, be careful when you think you are justified in shunning another believer who seeks restoration and wants to rebuild trust. You may be shunning the one God has called to use mightily for Him.
What are your plans this week? I doubt any of us have “assassination attempt” with a daring escape for our lives scheduled in our calendar. Sometimes, God will allow undesirable things in our pathway. When God does allow such things, trust Him. Run to Him. Cling to Him. Keep a teachable spirit — and then look to serve God wherever He leads you.