Have you ever taken a walk down memory lane? I have.
…the day they were born
…the day she sang with us for missionary deputation as a 4-year-old
…the day each of our kids got saved…and I later baptized them
…the day he stuffed socks in the shoulders of his shirt to play football
…the day we watched a nurse take our baby down the hall for surgery
These all seem like yesterday! Time passes, we all get older, and there ought to be great maturity that accompanies age. We may forget some things, and yet, there are things we are told to purposely never forget.
PROACTIVE - Proverbs 3:1 says, “My son, forget not my law; but let thine heart keep my commandments:”
WARNING - Deut. 8:11 says, “Beware that thou forget not the LORD thy God, in not keeping his commandments, and his judgments, and his statutes, which I command thee this day:”
REBELLION - Deut. 9:7 says, “Remember, and forget not, how thou provokedst the LORD thy God to wrath in the wilderness: from the day that thou didst depart out of the land of Egypt, until ye came unto this place, ye have been rebellious against the LORD.”
We are living in a day when too often God’s people are quick to forget the law of God!
Thou shalt not have any other gods before me (Ex. 20:3)
Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain (Ex. 20:7)
Keep the Sabbath day, to keep it holy (includes need to rest) (Ex. 20:8)
Honor thy father and thy mother (Ex. 20:12)
Thou shalt not bear false witness (Ex. 20:16)
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbor’s. (Ex. 20:17)
Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and withal thy mind. (Matt. 22:37)
And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. (Matt. 22:39)
When we study scripture, we come to realize that God has given important commands surrounding the three institutions that He established: THE government (Rom. 13:1), the church (Eph. 1:22-23), and the family (Gen. 2:23-24).
When God’s people walk away from God’s Word, these institutions will fall!
Look at our current culture. The GOVERNMENT is in a state of upheaval accompanied by a steady march away from acknowledging the existence of God. Record numbers of “faithful believers” have ceased being part of the institution that God established — and called the CHURCH. The FAMILY is being attacked on all sides and succumbing to defeat too often. The family impacts the church, and the church impacts the government. The family unit is at the core of this societal impact! When God’s people walk away from God, it is no wonder that the institutions God established are not function as God established.
It is time to reevaluate and rededicate our lives to God’s intended purposes for the family!
Popular views on marriage: (according to Barna.org)
65% say it is good thing to live with your partner before marriage
84% say they live together before marriage to test compatibility
78% of Americans describe themselves as Christian
49% of Americans supports the Supreme Court decision for same-sex marriage
“Marriage is a covenant before God between a Man and a Woman”
o 42% of Millennials agree (born early 80’s to early 2000’s)
o 52% of Generation X-ers agree (born early 1960’s to late 1970’s)
o 54% of Boomers agree (born 1946 to 1964)
o 61% of Elders agree (born prior to 1946)
What did God have in mind regarding marriage? Turn to Genesis 2:18-25.
Marriage was instituted for new COMPANIONSHIP
Genesis 2:18. Man was created a social being. God said it wasn’t good for him to be alone. God answers this need (aloneness) with a woman.
The person you married cared for you so deeply that they chose to marry you! Yet, there are marriages filled with very lonely people. Spouses have strayed from where they began in their dating relationship! God gave you your spouse because it wasn’t good that you were alone. Some of our marriages are not doing well simply because the couple are not friends! Return to your spouse and get to know them again!
Talk to them – and let them talk to you!
Practice patience with one another (you both have struggles)
Practice selfless love for each other
Pray for one another
Develop a strong relationship with your help meet! Value each other!
Marriage was instituted for new RELATIONSHIP
Genesis 2:24. A newly married couple is a new family unit and is no longer under the parental protective custody. The new relationship requires (to a degree) leaving the old relationship! God’s intent of this marriage relationship requires Mom and Dad to back off so the new marriage can begin as God intended to – “Therefore shall a man LEAVE his father and his mother….”
It’s a good thing to have a little time and distance between Mom and Dad and a child’s new marriage!
Respect one another’s homes
Give your child room to make choices like you did
Give support when asked (stop telling them what to do)
Pray for your parents/child fervently
Honor your parents (hold them in high regard in word and action)
Protect your wife
Marriage was instituted for new EXPRESSION
Genesis 2:24. “…one flesh….” is understood as an inseparable unit…a monogamous unit…a one-man, one-woman unit! This phrase indicates an expression that was both symbolic and physical.
The physical relationship is a beautiful gift from God. It is not sinful. It is God given. HOWEVER, it is God given within the realm of marriage! Take this gift outside of marriage and it becomes wicked and dirty.
Why did you get married? Do you remember how “in love” you were? What practices were you doing then that have stopped over time?
The frequent logic for resisting and for not nurturing a healthy marriage relationship often consists of these 4 battles:
1. Bitterness/Lack of Forgiveness
2. Lack of communication/Bad communication skills
3. Anger management/Stress management
4. Immorality (online or in-person)
We must guard our hearts against the variations and additions to this covenant with God. If we don’t, we will find ourselves with all sorts of marriage problems, deviant lifestyles, and very heavy baggage we never thought we would have to carry! Let’s sum all of this up with 4 choices to aim for God’s target:
1. Forgive…and let God handle any necessary judgement
2. Talk…and listen to understand instead of listening to respond
3. Identify triggers…and choose stress relief (exercise, rehearsing)
4. Mortify sin…and establish new patterns with godly counsel
Choose God’s purpose for your marriage or for your future marriage…and then make daily choices that aim for God’s marriage target!