Forgiving Power: 6 Steps to Confront Others Biblically

The scene can be all too familiar.  Another believer says some hurtful words to you or about you to another…they tear down your reputation…they speak as one knowing the situation to others but in truth they know very little information and are missing much of the complete story.  What do you do when others are talking about you behind your back and spreading lies?

You approach the source and in love ask them if these things are true and if at the point, they ask for your forgiveness – you do just that – you forgive them.  It is vital that we forgive as Christ has forgiven us!…but it isn’t always the easy path to walk! See what Jesus says in Luke 17.

Consequences of the Action (Luke 17:1-2)

We will give offense (James 3:1-2). The word “offend” means to cause to stumble or fall into temptation.

We are currently in a worldwide pandemic.  Our President of the US has had to make some tough decisions.  Decisions that are unprecedented. These decisions are unprecedented because this pandemic is like nothing we have seen in our life time (COVID19). There is no surprise that everyone doesn’t agree with his decisions!  If he says, “Yes” – people are going to be offended…if he says, “No,” – people are going to be offended.

We cannot lead our homes, our workplaces, and our church with a mindset of what will please the most people.  That is the wrong target…with the wrong motivation...and it will yields troubling outcomes.  The church must lead with a mindset of what will draw me closer to Jesus.  Such a motivation (what draws me closer to Jesus) will draw me to excellence…it will draw me to holiness…it will draw me to love…it will draw me closer to others who have differing preferences when they draw close to Jesus as well!

We will offend with:

  • Actions

  • Words

  • Attitudes

  • Absence

  • Presence

Some may say or think… “then there is no use in trying if we most certainly will offend… right?” What do you think? Does that sound like wise counsel? Let’s follow that logic for a moment.

My room will just get a mess again…why make it clean?

My body will just get dirty again…why take a shower?

My car will just run out of gas again…why fill it up with gas?

Even though no human is without fault, we cannot forget there are consequences to our actions!  We will suffer punishment. The warning of punishment is issued to the offender.

But more importantly – “giving up”  or “why even try” are not our target!  We are called to a higher purpose…to higher ground.  As believers, we have the Spirit of God dwelling within us.  We are without excuse! So, do not take lightly this warning! Galatians 6:7-8.

The Response of the Action (Luke 17:3-5)

The Confrontation. Don’t let offenses fester in your heart into a big ball of bitterness (Hebrews 12:14-15) – but don’t be so easily offended at every look and comment made as well (Psalm 119:165)! 

However, since we know offenses will cross our path, how do we handle them? What is our game plan?

6 Steps to Confront Others Biblically

1.  Seek the Lord on the matter (prayer and scripture) — Ps. 63:1; Matt. 6:33

2.  Be certain there is no fault of your own left unconfessed — Matt. 7:3-5

3. Be certain you are confronting sin and not personal preference - Luke 17:3

4. Approach Spirit-filled to the best of your knowledge - II Tim. 3:16

6. Plead the need for making right before God - Matt. 18:15-20

It is a lot easier to write out this game plan than it is to implement it. Humanly speaking, this is — no doubt — a difficult response, humanly speaking!  This is a spiritual work needing spiritual enabling. Ephesians 4:32; 5:18. And now look at Luke 17:5. The apostles acknowledge the daunting instruction with verse 5, “Increase our faith!”

The Necessity of the Action (Luke 17:6)

The apostles hit it right on the head, but slipped off and hit their thumb as well!  Yes, faith in the Lord for His enabling grace is of absolute necessity; however, it is not how much (as in quantity) but how long (as in duration) that faith is understood best in the scriptures!

The Hall of Faith in Hebrews rehearses the testimony of faith in God. Take a look at Hebrews 11:

v. 7  -Noah - waited 120 years for God’s announced judgement

v. 11-Sarah - waited until old age before she conceived

v. 13-Not having received the promises but having seen them afar off!

v. 22 –Moses - 40 years in the wilderness with many complainers

v. 32-David - anointed King, but chased by Saul for a long time.

Faith is not “how much.” Faith is “how long.” So, please stop for a moment.  Be still.  Listen to God. Delay the usual swift human response of denial.  Just stop and consider honestly before God:

Are there offenses that still fester in your heart? 

Is there someone you need to ask for forgiveness? 

Is there someone you need to forgive? 

Are we on praying ground having forgiven others as Christ as forgiven us?

 Follow your gracious, merciful God (Luke 6:36) and forgive others.